The One When We Met

I was 33 years old, very nearly 34.

The day I met him was like my re-birth. Sounds kind of religious (which I am not) but there are few ways to describe what happened. So this is my truth...

I had been seeing someone in a D/s capacity for almost a year, on and off. We both knew it was destined to end. I wanted love and a meaningful, long-term relationship and he did not. So I began seriously looking for what I really wanted.

There are websites designed to help you find people with common interests and I joined one. Most of the people who frequent these sites are after a hook-up. Sorting the good ones out from the rest seemed easy enough. But after chatting with several men, I came to the conclusion that what I was looking for didn't exist. I had been told this by several people. Disappointed, I made the decision to stop looking.

M read some of my writing on that site and commented. He sent me a message to say that he liked it. I read his profile and he sounded a little too good to be true. Nevertheless, we began exchanging email. The conversation moved slowly but I was hesitant, not wanting to get my hopes up again.

Eventually, I figured I had nothing to lose and asked him to meet me for a coffee and a talk.

I knew it was him the moment I walked around the corner. He was incredibly tall and I can remember what he was wearing, right down to his shoes.

I should mention at this point that I am incredibly shy. We bought some coffee and sat down in front of the water. I don't remember what we talked about, but I do remember that I couldn't look at him. He noticed. I guess he wondered why. The day seemed to turn into evening so quickly. We spoke non-stop. He spoke, I listened. I tried hard to speak but I was so nervous.

The time came to say goodbye. There was a hug and a kiss on the forehead. As I walked back to the car, I thought to myself, "If I don't open up and try to connect, I will lose him".

That day that I met him was the day I began to try to be better person again. I wanted to see him again.

At 33, I had finally found someone.

So I jumped.