Right. So, my midgets are back home where they belong, and so am I. I left M yesterday knowing it would be difficult to be alone again. I almost thought, back to reality, but that wouldn't be true. While I've been there we have just been living our lives. He's been going to work and I have been doing house things and reading and doing the shopping. All that is left is for me to learn how to cook and I will be a domestic goddess!
I thought back over the week and noticed that we spent lots of time together as well as lots of time doing our own things. I was left alone to read and go out, and he did his work and spent time with his kids. The puppy and I hung out and I think we we have reached an understanding.
After I told M the other day that I missed him, he brought it up. He was fucking me and he asked what it was that I missed. I told him it was his presence. I may be imagining it but it felt like my thoughts travelled into his brain and he knew what I meant. He'd grabbed my hair and gotten all dommy on me. I felt safe and wanted. Submitting to him is the sweetest surrender.
The thought pushing is funny that way. It certainly wasn't the first time it had happened. I have often felt things and wanted him to say something or to reassure me or to do something, and he has moved instinctively to meet my thought.
I missed cuddling up to him last night. The smell of him is absent. Sigh...
Switching to a more unpleasant topic...
Yesterday I was told something that made me quite annoyed with my ex. That, of course, led to a trail of other exes that I am annoyed with. I spoke to M about it. That man is so patient. He said he understood entirely. He also reminded me that the actions of others are beyond our control. He's so right. I made him promise that if she ever contacted him again, that he would tell me immediately. I think he heard in my voice that I really meant it. He said we should focus on the two of us and how well we are relating, and on how wonderful that is. I did a little flip out after I agreed and said that if she kept pissing me off that I would sort her out with an email...
And today I am home with my babies and chillaxing. I opened my eyes and reached for my phone to text my lover, and the phone rang in my hand. He called to say good morning :) How's that for timing :)
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